Response Paper #2 Mark Eubank = Modern Puritan?

Andrew Manning

Matt Thomas

Language Arts 11

09/17/07

Mark Eubank = Puritan?

A lot of you may know about Mark Eubank, the famous weatherman featured on our local KSL news broadcast on NBC. Mr. Eubank is my favorite weather man and I always watched the weather. But it just dawned on me that this old man could be a modern day puritan, but weather forecast being his religion rather than Protestantism. But what in the earth makes him so Puritanatic?

Something that you may see puritans do a lot, is arranging large spectacular public speeches. These speeches usually tried to provoke people to believe what they believed in. John Edwards did this all the time. Well my friends, Mr. Eubank does the same thing, but he has larger crowds than John Edwards could have hoped to have in his time. Mark Eubank had his speeches in front of a chroma key on localized television. How‘s over 100,000 thousand viewers for a crowd? Not only that, he infects the minds of little children with his weather phenomenon with speeches in elementary schools all over Utah.

All you ever see Mark Eubank do is talk about weather. Even on the news, the anchors will ask for his remark on a story and he will change the subject to weather even when his segment isn’t next. It’s like he talks about weather like men talk about sports. But how does this connect to him being a puritan? Well, puritans are obedient, are they not? Wouldn’t some one so obedient to a subject act like that subject was their highlight of the day? Most puritans have this loyalty to their religion, but when compared to Mark’s loyalty to weather, we can say that “obedient” is an understatement. He actually made his house and yard into a weather station, a church so to speak. Mark’s loyalty to weather is so absurd, there is no possible way anyone can weigh over this man on the scale of Obedience.

You can see now that Mark is absolutely a modern day puritan. In fact, he is probably better than any modern day puritan. If there were such things as Supermodified Puritans, Mark Eubank would be one. But now, with all evidence provided, let us imagine Mark Eubank was the same man back in the beginning of the puritan years. But instead of studying weather, he practiced Puritanism. Do you think that he would be just like Jonathan Edwards, or spectacularly better?